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The One to Watch: Yoko Ono Street
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the Bluecoat....
Hang on. We haven't even BEGUN to discuss the Ringo Starr house controversy.
Do you mean the Dingle terrace that tourists want to see the front of, but the council can't wait to see the back of.
Yep, yep, yep.
Move on everyone. There's nothing more to look at there.
There is! It hasn't been demolished yet.
You misunderstand. In this great maritime city of Liverpool - the news agenda has moved on.
Oooh, have we got that cruise terminal? European HQ of Goldman Sachs?
Ahem. No. We're still on the Beatles – and news that there's a proposal to name a street in Liverpool after....
Ringo!
Yoko Ono actually.
...because I was thinking, they could turn the Dingle into a theme park. Knock all those derelict terrace houses into one, like in that film Help!...
Look, we are talking about the performance artist, singer and creator of Bag One here. The former wife of Beatle John. Campaigners want a street named after her. They say Yoko has contributed to the culture and fabric of the city. That she deserves recognition for the artworks she has put in Liverpool and the contribution she has made to its thriving tourist industry.
Enough, clearly is never enough. John Lennon Airport, streets in Kenny named after each of the Beatles and if you want a Fab statue we have got one to spare...
One? about two dozen actually. Yes, and we will shortly have the Nepstein Theatre, not to mention hotels with names like Hard Day's Night, play centres called Yellow Submarine and moptop reminders on every corner “in the town where I was born”.
Oh aye? Sounds like you don't want Yoko to have a street named after her...
Don't look at me, pal. It's Liverpool City Council who aren't so sure. She's not on the list.
List? There's a bleedin' list? Well who exactly IS on the list.
Stuart Sutcliffe, Pete Best and other also-rans.
We could have a Heather Mills Lane...
..where the tenants refuse to go after four years unless you give them a massive wodge of what you own.
Why are they saying “oh no way” to Ono Way?
Councillor Malcolm Kennedy reveals: "We are currently compiling a list of names that we are looking to use in new developments....Pete Best was there with them in Hamburg, played on stage with them, and was very much part of the formation of The Beatles. The same goes for Stuart Sutcliffe. He added: “I am not so keen on the idea of Yoko Ono Street though."
Easy for Councillor Kennedy to say. He's got an airport in New York named after him.
He has since said it was a joke and that he's got nothing against Yoko really.
But he just doesn't fancy a street named after her. So who does?
Beatle tour guide Phil Coppell who thinks Yoko should also be granted the Freedom of the City so she can go here, there and everywhere.
Isn't he the one campaigning to keep Ringo's house?
For the last time, we're not discussing Ringo's house! But yes, that's him.
Mr Coppell argues: "Yoko played a massive part in John Lennon's life and as the world centre of Beatles history it would be right to name one of our streets after her.” While June Lornie, of Liverpool Academy of Arts, says there aren't enough streets in Liverpool named after women.
I dunno. Next we'll be naming our streets after Beatles songs.
What? Like "Drive My Car Drive?"
"Penny Lane Lane".
Not forgetting "The Long and Winding Road Road".
That's more like it. We're here all week folks!
Hmm, yes. So you are... What was it you were wanting to say about Ringo's house again?
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So they want to name a street in Liverpool after Pete Best. What about Allan Williams, for feck's sake? He gave the Beatles away and does more for the daytime economy on Slater Street than Yoko Ono or any of them. Rex Makin, the Beatles solicitor who has been a bigger benefactor to Liverpool and is made to sit next to a fecking hairdresser in Capital of Culture year. What about a Rexie Road? Williams Way? Pete Best, sorry, the world has gone mad.
How about a street in Liverpool named after some of the non-Beatles people who were just as important to the cultural fabric of the city. Pete Postlethwaite for example.
Don't you mean Pete Price for example?
Adrian Henri.
This is ridiculous. How can you justify having a Yoko Street. She hasn't done anything for this city. Benefactor being a euphemism for investing in it as some godawful theme park like a business opportunity. Which it is. Yoko Ono is a very shrewd business woman who came along right at the tail end of the Beatles. THE BEATLE TOUR GUIDE is obviously only doing this out of the goodness of his heart and has no self interest either.
No Way. Queer Street. Shank Leigh. Not Even Close. Bus Lane. I'll stop now. Wolf Hall Crescent.
Are old folk still going on about the Beatles?
They're SO old hat.
Actually, They are so old hi-hat
Salad Daze I love u
Isn't it odd how so many people who go on in such a mawkish all sad face way about Lennon's death and who still find the loss so hard to live with and who will have their self indugent little weep every December because he was so special and because they loved him so much, are quite content to trash the name and spit their bile on the woman he loved and chose to spend the rest of his life with. And wasn't that very spit and bile towards her one of the main reasons he left the UK? What do you think your working class hero would think of that?
As far as I am aware, Yoko Ono is responsible for a significant amount of cash donations to causes within the city, as well as visiting and helping Lennon's old school in Dovedale Road, where she was mobbed by the kids and the staff last summer.
I guess people still have to blame her for the break-up of the Beatles because otherwise, they might have to blame Macca and John themselves. And another thing, as one of the pictures highlights, I don't recall Cilla or Bessie Braddock putting photos of their minge all along Church Street! So give her some credit.
Personally I couldn't give a toss but my preference for naming things would have been Arthur Askey Airport "Above us only Bees"
How about Bill Shankly Airport: Above us only Chelsea, Man Utd. Arsenal, Bolton, Tottenham, Everton....
Dearest No Jose Way
I dreamed about you last night.
Dear Waldorf Salad Daze,
I would like to say I dreamed about you too.
Unfortunately I dreamed about Wayne Rooney last night. We were in Bold Street and I decided to tell him where he was going wrong in his career. "The fact is," I said "You have become such a perfectionist that you are no longer able to take risks. You worry about looking like a fool and so you do nothing."
He looked at me for a moment and then growled. I thought he might head-butt me, but we ended up at a party full of WAGs instead.
Steven Gerrard was there and my trousers went missing at some point.
I awoke in a daze on the bedroom floor.
Any idea what this means, anyone?
It means, "Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness." (Sigmund Freud)
O No...
John Lennon wasn't working class. He grew up in nice houses in posh areas, went to posh schools and went to art school when normal went to work at 15.
He was MIDDLE class
Curtis Warren Way
Tommy Hanley Avenue
Clive Swift Street
Clive Barker Weint
Clive of India Buildings..or am I thinking of Gordon of Courtroom.
Alright, Alfred The Great Homer Street
Do they have to be from Liverpool? We could have the Wavertree Degrees or The Dave Clark Fiveways.
Sonia Way. No it's not, it's miles out me way.
Robert Robinson Road
Leonard Rossiter Road
David Burke Way
Kim Cattrall Corner
Dame May Whitty Boulevard
Liz Gebhardt Grove
How about:
Blimey-Carol-Decker-from-T'Pau-was-from-Huyton Street?
Or - Rex-Harrison-went-to-school-in-Huyton Avenue?