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The One to Watch: Danielle Lloyd

This week: The celebs are dropping off like flies in the Big Brother House. But it'll take more than Jade Goody and her mum to scare off our own Danielle Lloyd

Published on February 7th 2008.

The One to Watch: Danielle Lloyd

There's a Scouse in the house: Oh yes, but Danielle Loyd has got a hard act to follow if she's to move from her current 14/1 outsider ranking to victory in the Big Brother House and membership of Liverpool's reality TV elite

Go on, remind us: We're always winning this stuff. We can't go wrong. Big Brother's first ever winner was Huyton's Craig Phillips and its first Celebrity version in 2001 did more for runner-up Claire Sweeney's career than it ever did for victor and miserable southern git Jack Dee. Jenny Ellison and Kerry Katona have both hit the Number One spot on reality TV shows, while housemates Pete Burns and Les Dennis have grabbed headlines and kept boats rocking in seas of good behaviour.

Thinking man's totty? Who, Pete Burns?

Sorry? Oh. You mean our Danielle? Well funny you should mention that. The disgraced Miss Great Britain and girlfriend of, er, Miss Great Britain judge Teddy Sheringham, actually scored 152 in an IQ test as part of BBC TV's Test The Nation. Genius is anything above 140. “I can't believe it!” gurgled the 22-year-old from Penny Lane at the time. “I thought I was stupid.”

Remarkable! Einstein's IQ was only 160: Quite. And anyone who thought Teddy was just another footballer looking for a Playboy model to make himself feel better about the onset on middle age and wrinkles was wrong. Science is Danielle's speciality. She left St Hilda's with nine GCSEs and spurned a promising career in chemistry and biology to become a nail technician.

Well technician sounds scientific. It does, but Danielle was in it for purely altruistic reasons. She wanted to “make people feel good about themselves”.

So all the time Teddy was seeing beyond the 36-inch chest and wondering about her grasp of alkaline anion-exchange membranes. That's our girl; Einstein may have explained relativity to the world, but nothing puts a smile on your face like having your nails done.

What's the future? Well the sky's the limit for a BB winner. If the de-throned beauty queen plays her cards right she could have her own chat show, fitness DVDs or pop album.

Or a stint on Newsnight? Don't get carried away. On Test The Nation Danielle was asked: "Who was Winston Churchill - a rapper, US President, the PM or King?" She quickly replied: "Wasn't he the first black president of America? There's a statue of him near me - that's black."

Most likely to say: “I want people to recognise the real Danielle.”

Least likely to say: “Is that a heterogenous molecular mass or are you just pleased to see me?"

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Lord LucanJanuary 9th 2007.

Dear Confidential,I would watch Miss Lloyd as per your instructions but I believe she is on Television X and I'd need to pay a subscription to watch that depressing filth.

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