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Person who used to live in Liverpool might get married again....

Shock news dipped in scouse

Published on January 19th 2010.

Person who used to live in Liverpool might get married again....

A MAN who lived in Liverpool, once, might get married again, it was claimed last night.

The news, which was described as “sensational” immediately sparked speculation across the city that it would be the third such wedding of the unnamed man, pictured.

“What has Heather Mills ever done for Liverpool?” asked one bus passenger, when we asked them if they knew. “She hasn't been here for 50 years.”

The news follows reports this week that Liverpool's population has been decreasing since the 1960s, which a fellow passenger, standing up, described as “ironic”.

The man's latest would-be bride to be, who also doesn't live here, appears to be “minted” say sources, and a spokesman for United Utilities agreed that this was “fair play” to him.

According to rumours, the man's brother, who still lives here and who goes by the name of “Our kid” commented: “He might not be 64, like in the song, any more. But he's still got it in him.

“It's thumbs up all round - at least in all these photies I've taken.”

In other news: Curtis Warren still in jail with other criminals....

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Victoria StreetJanuary 19th 2010.

Are Curtis Warren's prison guards called Cocky Watchmen

CorrespondentJanuary 19th 2010.

Doesn't anyone recognise Gerry Marsden when they see him? Looks like he's just had a rather good lunch with Professor Chucklebutty in The Grapes.

Sid BonkersJanuary 19th 2010.

Oh, that's CURTIS Warren in that headline, is it? I assume it was that Bradley fella.

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