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Iron men in ASBO beach rampage

Exclusive: Families “stunned” as Antony Gormley statues leave trail of devastation

Published on June 14th 2009.

Iron men in ASBO beach rampage

A SO CALLED art work was being slammed today by thousands of stunned sun-worshippers after the beach on which they are set was mindlessly wrecked in BROAD DAYLIGHT.

Antony Gormley's so-called Another Place statues occupy the coastline between Waterloo and Crosby Coastguard station. There are thought to be as many as a hundred of them, according to estimates.

But trouble flared yesterday, traditionally the hottest day of the year, when thousands of families and groups of young friends travelled from all over Merseyside to enjoy the sunshine.

It was all peaceful until around 8pm, according to one man who did not wish to be named. “We had just been observing a beautiful array of tattoos, that had landed nearby, on a full case of WKD.

“They were doing nobody any harm and there had been a brilliant atmosphere all day. People were getting a bronzy, and I wasn't the only fella to spark up the barbie. She didn't mind, like.”

But suddenly the mood got nasty.

“They (the iron men) just completely lost it,” said one woman who did not wish to be named.

“We thought there might be a kick-off earlier in the afternoon. They were trying to stir things up. Going around the few bins there are and filling them up with rubbish and then standing guard over them so no one could get near them. It was disgraceful.

“There were thousands of people right across the beach, but it got so terrifying that we all just left. All the children were crying. We didn't have chance to take any of our stuff with us.”

Bleary eyed onlookers who fled the scene, the first recreational stretch of coast outside Liverpool, told how the

so-called statues had started:

*Drinking STELLA and smashing bottles.
*Using FOUL language.
*Stripping NAKED.
*Changing terrified babies' NAPPIES and throwing them everywhere.

“It was horrible. We never stood a chance,” said one shaking mum of four who was catching the train back home from Waterloo Station on the area's own “Sunset Strip”, South Road.

“We've lost all our rubbish. We just had to leave it there. And we won't be coming back for it either.


Despite repeated efforts, the statues refused to comment today.

But Colonel Ginger McBeehive, MBE, chairman of the local Delta Taxi Users Association, later told Liverpool Confidential: “What we need is a good war.”

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22 comments so far, continue the conversation, write a comment.

Rusty SpikeJune 2nd 2009.

Ah, Deirdre...a teacher. Incidentally I suspect that your line 'what a load of old rubbish' is actually not a pun...but hey ho. Being clearly out of step with 'liberal' journals such as the G, who casually take young staff on without wages calling it an internship, I'll stay behind after class and write ten thousands lines: 'Deirdre is not amused'. Are you my auntie Deirdre, by the way? She was a teacher but also a nun who liked puns.

Le Professeur a chié en parcJune 2nd 2009.

Ce qui est un anus pour sinon pour laisser beaucoup de merde?

Wimply redJune 2nd 2009.

She might get into bad habits, but that wouldn't be a pun, like her rubbish quip, which works on every level, except the pun level, because it is merely a play on words. If she were a teacher of English Literature in a convent school, and class were studying the Barratts of Wimple Street, that might work as a pun, but not a very good one.

PH DeeJune 2nd 2009.

I don't think Deirdre quite understands this punning business. She should take a day off school. After all, clarity begins at home

BRING BACK LAZJune 2nd 2009.

Ooh, is Rusty Spike referring to himself here with a bit of self deprecating, double punnery. I think we Neild to know.

Le Voyageur Sensible.June 2nd 2009.

Les mêmes ici, Tina ma bonne dame. Les Britanniques (les anglais en particulier) ont la plus mauvaise réputation pour le barbare comportement dans l'Europe, sinon le monde entire! Arseholes!

Dimply TedJune 2nd 2009. liverpool all right.

Ikea KitchenerJune 2nd 2009.

This is a British problem

Rusty SpikeJune 2nd 2009.

There's now like nailing yer colours to the mast, so to speak....

TinaJune 2nd 2009.

At least now the sun has gone in. This is shocking but typical. You wouldn't get this sort of behaviour anywhere else in the world but this country. It's east to tut-tut, of course, but the fact is I and my friends keep our mouths shut when on holiday abroad, purely because we're a bit embarrassed about being English

AnonymousJune 2nd 2009.

Sorry to sound like a reactionary ba****d, but would it not be good if we got all the people on probation to clear all this ****e up. Or would they moan and sue about not having any suncream on?

Sir Minge CampbellJune 2nd 2009.

I agree, you should sack the c**t who wrote that.

Rusty SpikeJune 2nd 2009.

Clearly, Deidre, you are not into the subtle yet sharply sensational ways of tabloid reports, more of a Gruniad person maybe? It takes great skill, Deidre dear heart...

Rusty SpikeJune 2nd 2009.

Well, I think yees folks on the coast should be delighted...Tracey Emin wins awards - and loadsa dosh - for this kind of rubbish, assembled artistically, of course.

KenJune 2nd 2009.

If you teachers did a better job people would behave better in public.You shouldn't let your pupils call you Deirdre for a start.

The Liverpool SchoolJune 2nd 2009.

If Deirdre was a teacher in a convent school, would she be a nun conformist?

OffendedJune 2nd 2009.

I find the use of the word "TW*TS" in this article offensive. Its obvious to me that the author needs his language cleaning up as well as the beach!

John BullJune 2nd 2009.

Когда я зарубежом я претендуйте что я русск!

Pimply redJune 2nd 2009.

That was absolutely punful. Go back to school, Liverpool School

deirdreJune 2nd 2009.

Dear rusty spike you keep taking the tabloids, I will take the guardian along with other like journals.But it remains a p*** pot poor piece of work, not clever not funny, very childish.Being a teacher I would say my pupil - must do better, stay behind after class Deirdre is not amused

deirdreJune 2nd 2009.

What a load of old rubbish (no pun intended) this piece reads like a school boy essay. How much further must the standard fall? We need Laz back for some sensible debate. BRING BACK LAZ BRING BACK LAZ ...... come on join in !!

AnonymousJune 2nd 2009.

Ahhh good old liverpool. I'll never forget the days out to another place, stumbeling over the bricks, watching the rats eat peoples rubbish. Such good fun!

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