Fool shocker

IN A move described as “the nanny state gone mad”, Liverpool City Council is this week expected to ban the word “fool” from its dealings, communications and daily vocabulary within its staff, operations and preferred suppliers.

According to the council and Liverpool Vision, who commissioned a consultation exercise and a report by the liberal Cambridge think tank “More Fool You”, the word has pejorative connotations, lowers individuals' standing in the eyes of their peers, can lead to low self esteem and, like purple wheelie bins, really has no place in Liverpool.

Under the controversial proposals, being considered by the ruling executive committee and several highly paid officials, the song Fool On The Hill would disappear from this year's Beatles Day. Yes, there really is going to be another one.

Fruit fools will vanish from school dinner menus and Councillor Berni “Inn” Turner, who is in charge of the city's restaurants, is insisting that the F word be removed from all fine dining dessert menus at places such as the London Carriage Works and 60 Hope Street.

Anyone breaching the rule may be subject to a fool surcharge.

A spokesman for Liverpool City Council said: “People aren't fools, you know.”