Beatles Day

That last blog was a rather enjoyable and enlightened 5 minutes. Thanks Prof you have restored the balance to my universe. All is forgiven. Apart from not reading my other entry correctly. In that particular entry I invited a lady to rub my veg for luck not me rubbing a horses veg! Anyhow lets visit various blogs, rub horses veg and put the Capital of Custard to rights over a Cains finest in The Old Post Office. Sounds like a plan. I might just do that tonight as I have a day off tomorrow from my Japanese slave masters.

It is obviously the lunatic fringe that is responsible for this madcap idea! Why can't we have an Arthur Askey day? He was much funnier than The Beatles, as well as being highly controversial, he was nearly shot by the BBC for swearing on the wireless during the War!

Good to see that the hugely underrated Beatles are finally being recognised on Merseyside. We cannot afford for this seminal band to drop off the musical radar in Liverpool.Special thanks go to Ricky Tomlinson, long may he remain out of obscurity and in the public eye, representing everyone in Liverpool with his scruffy, tramp-like visage.

I dont think Arthur Askey bought in the money to Liverpool the way the Beatles have done.

That is just a rumour London thank you. I know my father is God. (Short for Gordon). I am known to friends and family as Dig or Digga Prof. No relation to Doc Green and more likely to break the law than join it. Shouldn't tell you all my real nickname is Digga. How do I know somebody here isn't one of my mortal enemas?

Deep joy! An authenticode celeberation of the Capitalode of Culturlode!

Indeed. Fantastic to see Prof Chucklebutty now addressing a different audience (well maybe only a little different) but hopefully his blog will continue via liverpool subculture. Can I be the first to say that he has probably been the single best thing to come out of Capital of Custard so far? Long may he continue...

its me again a lovely fragrant 30s brunette film star type in a field of dead wheat hair and bald scallies who are constantly rude and jealous of me. apart from the tracksuit trevors another thing about here that is profoundly itch making is this worship of the beatles with their happy clap along simple songs not as infuriating as football and gerry and the pacemakers isnt liverpool wonderful why are you not smiling love attitude but galling when you think of bands like magazine, gang of four, sparks, joy division, even some early echo bunnymen - woefully under recognised with their glacial cold ironic emotional loners songs. you are seen as a weirdo here if you dare say the beatles are over rated just because of the hype and as they are from liverpool and get this we celebrate them for their liverpoolness but they dont live here do they? they had the money so they could get out. its not them as individuals i object to i think ringo seems a pretty decent quiet guy who was spot on on jonathan ross! but its just too much is made about them and their music like football is here. i am a surrealist artist so i dont do mainstream unless i happen to like it ... i like it... no help me sir the pacemakers are chirping scouse like happy men laugh at everything the world is wonderful tunes ...

He's a cross between Alan Partridge, Jeremy Clarkson and David Brent. And not funny.

Blimey! Can I get off to Asda now?

To the people who just don't get what the Proff is on about, your wasted 5 mins could be worth a few bob in the future. When we all look back over the year of so called Culture, The Proff will be one of the highlights of the year.I've already got my Proff stories ready to sell to the News of the World.Sadly he is not Mayor yet, but when he is I know my stories will be worth more!As someone keeps saying,Keep on keeping on Proff

Talk Sport is a magic button in my car and Gaunty is the voice that eminates from the dashboard when I press said button. Actually I think I ran over somebody called Gaunty and now he's stuck behind the engine. The cheeky scamp likes to wind people up. That's why I knocked him over.

I might join you, Dig.

Agreed!

Thanks for the watch. It worked a treat. I regained those 5 minutes. Strangely the watched vanished when the minutes had elapsed.

Who the heck is Chas Cole?

Even though I'm not a big Beatles fan I recognise the part they play in the history and present of this city. I'm sure there will be plenty of people celebrating and enjoying Beatles Day. Even tho I'm not going to be one of them I think there's enough fans around the world to make Beatles Day a success today and for years to come.

We should have a Leon Kay Day. Everyone wears a frowning mask and we go about complaining about everything and writing angry letters to the press. (We'd have to excuse the students the last bit as they have difficulty writing)

Is this supposed to be a highlight of 2008? Beatle wigs; "tribute" bands on the ferries & roofs; yeah,yeah,yeahs, ad nauseam? Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't this supposed year of culture designed to showcase the city's current cultural offerings more than what's gone before? This is truly pathetic. It's bread & circuses stuff, too. What better to distract attention from the city council's bumbling, cack-handed & downright corrupt running of Liverpool than to exhume the Merseybeat corpse? I'm just glad I won't have to be in the city centre today.

So does Dig not know who his dad is, or is that just a rumour?

Rusty Spike has nailed it. Almost. But here's a few questions....What's the basis for this charidee event? Promoter Chas Cole's CMP web site says all profits will go to charidee. Howe does he define profit?Then it says all proceeds go to charidee.So which is it?And what are the proceeds?What do they include?Is Chas getting paid for this or not?Who else is taking their fee out of all this then? Who provided the wigs? At what cost? What's the profit in the £5 sales? What did it cost to make them?What's the rake-off for those taking part? And what proportion of the revenue raised is actually going to charidee?Are the books going to be open to public inspection? After all, it is the public who are being asked to make this event a success with their hard-earned dosh.If not open and transparent, why not?And finally, is anyone, anywhere, ever going to challenge any of this self-serving, self-righteous, self-promoting nonsense that infects Liverpool so much?

Did anybody listen to Gaunty on Talk Sport 10/07/2008? He said The Beatles are overrated. Compared them to a 60's version of Girls Aloud! Also, apparently us Scousers need to get a life for celebrating 'Beatles Day'.I'm sure he didn't believe a word he said though. I am sure he enjoyed winding people up to get a few calls into his pokey little show. Silly insignificant little man!

My word, that surrealisthairybeauty doesn't half go on. Keep it short and simple is my motto.

Pah, Liverpool been celebrating Beatles day for the last 40 years.Get a new band! ;) ;)

Evenin' all. Dig, soon as I saw your name, I thought ahh Dig son of Doc Green. I have only heard the name once before, Doc's Lad, and it's unusual but I suppose on this thing you just use it as a pseudonym. To answer you question, Doc was lecturer and expert in "blue lamp" technology, law of physics and all that. I don't pretend to understand. The Dig I knew joined the Police but never really progressed.Anyway that's that solved.

Isn't EVERYBODY the Beatles Editor at the Echo?

I have been a Beatles fan all my life, adore 'em, but this sort of stunt is actually putting me off them, and I never thought that could be possible.

Altough I felt that particular blog wasted 5 minutes of life I feel I must say you are still one of my all time heroes Prof.

Thank you, Margaret. The cheque is in the post.

To the paragraph creator, apologies and gratitude. My first career being a Jam Miner working on the Rasberry seam for fifteen years until I was forced to retire with Sticky Finger, I am not too adept at all this technology. To my "fan" who said there is not a satirist to touch me, wrong I am afraid. I cannot play a note on the satire. However I do a play a mean bongo.But Dig, I fear is owed the biggest apology for wasting 5 minutes of your life. Fear not, I will compensate you. I will send you my old wristwatch which always runs 5 minutes slow. Pop it on and bob's your uncle. By the way Dig are you related to one of our faculty? You are not Dig, son of Doc Green are you?Don't on any account go to my Capital of Custard site or you will waste many hours of your life and the bloke in the pub only has so many dodgy watches for sale.Hello Tony P hope you can assist in the campaign below.A Statue of Frankie and a Knightshirt..er hood for T-Rex, Now!

This isn't the letters page of Smash Hits c.1977, surrealistfairybeauty

Who? Chas Cole or Ricky Tomlinson?

I have just wasted about 5 minutes of my life reading that and I'll never get it back. Thanks Prof.

Well, that's it then. All the ballyhoo about Capital of Culture and how we've shown 'em southern nancies a thing or two about de arts, and how The Pool has shown that gunslinging Klimt he can stable his hoss for a while, and Bryn Terfel has them weeping in the aisles with You'll Never Walk Alone. Mind you, I thought that was a low note for culture, like. Then we really feck the whole thing up with a kind of mass hysteria with an infantile plan for all citizens to don mop-top wigs. Even the bloody polticians have fallen for this rubbish - mind you, they would, it gets their picture in the papers and takes the heat off the row about their extravagant expenses. It beggars belief that after so much has been achieved to get shut of that old 'All Scousers are Plant Pots' line that some half wits have come up with this - and I don't give a fig that its for charity. Lots of things can be done for charity. But this is the pits. I bet Macca is guffawing. Why not get everyone rustling up a scouse pie while yer at it or hire a stall at Paddy's Market for the day and flog off shell suits and trainers. The southerners and other natives of the British Isles will be double up with mirth - not laughing with Liverpool but once again laughing at it. Where's that bloody cruise ship that was in town recently? Wonder if there's any jobs in the galley...

I hear that it was all a bit of a shambles. The bands having to lug their PA equipment around the streets, being ordered off the roof of the Echo Arena for health and safety reasons. So ill-thought out as well as making the city look like a laughing stock. Well, well, well.

Anyone want to help raise money for paragraphs?I think I should have used the HRT editor sorry.

Oooh, Professor Chucklebutty, you are a card an' no mistake!

To answer your other question Prof I'm not related to Doc Green. I'm curious to know who that is and why you thought I'm related to him. I fear I'm missing a joke somewhere there.

Trisha said

Jim McCabe is right about everything. And his grammar and punctuation are exemplary. That student bloke on the other rant about litter could learn much from him. As could Chas Cole.

You're thinking of Granty, the Beatles Editor at the Echo

i see the echo's coverage of this troubled event - they blamed the weather for things going wrong, omitted to contain any mention of how much was raised and who got paid for what, never mind how many wigs, at a crisp fiver were sold. methinks we should be told....

Is he the Gaunty that works as a careers adviser at Liverpool Hope University?